Something I’ve really learned this past year has been that real friendship isn’t easy to find.
In school, I never had trouble making friends in my classes. But as time went on, most of the people I knew throughout my childhood drifted away. Some stayed, and the ones I surround myself with now are the people I can call family.
Being in college showed me that good friends aren’t always the people you spend time with. Sometimes we are put into social situations where our battery is drained, and we’re just counting the minutes until we can leave. Other times, I never want to be separated from the people I’m with, and I dread the moment we have to part ways.
Growing up is about learning who you are and who you want in your life. I never used to be picky about the friends I had around me, until I realized that I could be. Realizing that I don’t have to be friends with people who don’t make me feel good. There is no need to try to keep pleasing them- hanging out with them just so they don’t get upset with you.
What if you just didn’t care what they thought? Is it really so bad to not want to be friends with someone? This doesn’t mean they did me wrong, but there’s no need to force friendship where it shouldn’t be fostered. You can’t force love. You can’t force connection. Making other people happy isn’t the main goal of life, especially when it comes at the expense of your own happiness. There doesn’t need to be bad blood, but there doesn’t need to be fake love.
I can’t predict which of my friends I will still keep in touch with in 10 years. But, I sure do know which ones I won’t be seeing. I know the ones who feed my soul and accept my mind. I know the people who would pick me up when I’m down without wanting anything in return. I know the people who will support me through everything I go through in life, and the ones who will take my side just because it’s for me. I know the people who don’t act with jealousy or resentment. I know the people I’d like to be around when I’m celebrating or when I’m breaking down.
I know who my people are. I don’t need an army of connections. Just a few good ones will do.
Ashley